It's been 24 hours since our third baby beautifully came into our lives. I am laying on my bed resting and listening to him make sweet newborn noises. I feel like I'm in heaven.
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My in-laws were expecting me to go into labor any minute so the days dragged on and everyone started to get very anxious. I had my 41 week appointment with my midwife, Bernadette on Thursday April 23rd. She asked me if I wanted my membranes swept and call me crazy but I just didn't feel right about it. I wasn't ready. I hadn't had enough sleep the night before and to be completely honest I was having some fears. Fear is a very powerful demotivator and women naturally have many things to be fearful of. I knew that I shouldn't be fearful because I had been preparing my whole pregnancy, as well as my last pregnancy, for delivery time. Still, it's like a championship match in sports. Athletes prepare so much and for so long and it all comes down to one short game where they have to prove themselves and perform their very best.
Bernadette told me to go home, rest up, mentally prepare and come back the next morning ready to have a baby. So I did. Well first I went to the grocery store to make sure we had plenty of food in stock (not just for us but also because my brother-in-law had just flown in and boy can he eat! Lol). That afternoon it was hard to rest with all the excitement and kiddos so my Nano (Juan) took me out on a date. We went to a movie (Age of Adaline- great movie by the way) and for a walk in the park. Nano really helped me feel supported and empowered and got me pumped up and ready to give birth.
The next morning, at 3 am I woke up and couldn't get back to sleep. My thoughts were racing and my back was aching. Honestly, I hate being pregnant, it is so hard for me! I am nauseous after every meal, I have anemia and PICA (a condition that makes me crave non-foods like chalk, dirt, and concrete), and my back, hips and pelvis are always sore. But, I'll stop complaining because many women have it worse than me and I always tell myself to be grateful because my babies, though debilitatingly parasitic, are healthy. If I didn't have healthy pregnancies I wouldn't be able to birth the way I choose to so that is a big plus.
When Nano woke up I asked him to give me a blessing (he is a priesthood holder in our faith and can put his hands on my head and give me a blessing through the spirit). He quickly did so and got ready for work and the gym and took off. I was able to fall back asleep but after an hour was awakened by the garage door. I thought to myself, 'oh I really hope he is going to stay with me.' He came upstairs and said, "I don't know what I was thinking, I'm not going to work, I'm going with you to your appointment!" I was so grateful he followed the spirit! I needed him!
We quickly got ready and he woke up his mom and grandma to make us breakfast. Grateful again! I was just going to have a piece of toast. They made us a feast and we took off for the birth center with full bellies. 8:00 am. When we got there my midwife made me drink a strong tea to help soften my cervix and then checked me. I was dilated to a 4. She got things going by separating the bag of waters a little from the uterine wall. She said his head was not in an ideal position so she adjusted my back a little and did some interesting massage on my lower back. Then she told us to go walk for an hour and then come straight back.
There was a nice big park nearby so we stopped there to walk it out. It was a beatiful morning. A little sticky with humidity but there was a nice breeze and the park was full of birds singing and friendly squirrels rastling around. This is my idea of the beginning of a natural childbirth experience. Nano only noticed the mosquitoes. If you know my family you'd know that we all get stupidly optimistic every time we head out into nature. I mean, I was in the middle of a contraction and I saw a bunny rabbit in the bush and I started inching closer to get a good look at it! Nano had been timing my contractions and asked, "so did your contraction stop then?" I was like 'oh yeah, I think so.' Talk about pain management! I called my dad and told him where I was. He told me I couldn't leave until I spotted an armadillo. I know, we are ridiculous. On with the birth story.
My pressure waves (contractions) started to get shorter and stronger. I floated on my belly and hung over the side where Nano was, laying my head on his leg while he rubbed my back. It felt so good to have him rub away the pain. My midwife came in and asked if I was ready to push. I didn't think I was that far along. She checked me and said I sure was! Crazy! I told her not yet because my friend hadn't arrived yet. Back-story: I was so fortunate to meet someone a few weeks before my due date that had also given birth in the water AND in the caul (bag of waters). She had been planning to come and help us with her essential oils and photography. Well, she didn't make it (sorry Larissa!) I should have held him in for you ;)
I started to feel tons of pressure and reached down and could feel the baby's head. Time to push. I told Nano to take off his shirt and jump in. With a room full of ladies he said, "are you ready for this?" Haha, funny guy. As he proceeded to enter the tub, my midwife retorted, "uh, actually were not ready for you yet, how much do you weigh? 200?" He replied, "well I recently lost 30 pounds." We had to let some water out before he got in otherwise our teacup would have overflowneth.
The time came to push and I knew I wouldn't be comfortable on my back. I had to hold on to something so I turned and faced Nano and put my arms around his neck. I gradually got louder with my moaning and was basically screaming in his ear by the end. He just held me up and encouraged me. My midwife helped guide my pushing and after about 4 difficult pushing sessions through contractions, the baby was out! I'm not going to lie, I really felt the ring of fire this time. Like I was pushing a burning bowling ball out of me. Ouch! 12:45 pm. Nano had to catch the baby when my midwife brought him out of the water because I was so disoriented. It was an indescribable feeling! We did it! And Nainoa looked so peaceful and
calm like he didn't know what had just happened. He barely moved at first and that made Juan nervous. My midwife assured him that he was slowly taking it all in, no rush to take his first breath. He was purple and beautiful (this is why purple has been my favorite color since Melia was born). Black hair all over his head. Wrinkly skin and long fingers. Our perfect baby boy.
While Bernadette suctioned him a little and put a towel over him, we were able to get a little more comfortable and check him out. That first interaction with a newborn angel is priceless. It was a perfect moment and I'll never forget it.